In honor of Mother’s Day, I went looking for a bit of inspiration and came across this greeting, attributed to no one in particular:
When you’re a child she walks before you, to set an example.
When you’re a teenager she walks behind you, to be there should you need her.
When you’re an adult she walks beside you, so that as two friends you can enjoy life together.
It beautifully captures one of the most remarkable realities of motherhood, it is not a single role, but a series of evolving ones.
Ah, the many joys of motherhood: watching your child experience so many firsts, being their trusted safe harbor when things are uncertain, seeing them grow into unique human beings with a blend of familiar and entirely new quirks. There are the bear hugs (requested or not) and the steady expansion of your own patience, empathy, and resilience that motherhood seems to demand.
Full disclosure: I’m not a mom. However, I am an aunt to eleven nieces and nephews and fifteen great nieces and nephews – and counting. Over the years, I’ve had a front row seat to the lives of new moms as they, and their children, grow and transition over time. I love watching personalities emerge, passions take place, and paths begin to form. No two journeys look the same. As an aunt, my role has happily included cheering from the sidelines and spoiling whenever possible.
Becoming a parent for the first time is undeniably joyful. And, as joyous as it is, it also ushers in profound change: physical and hormonal shifts, identity changes sometimes intensified by pausing a career, fewer spontaneous connections with friends, and moments of isolation can all surface. Add anxiety around raising a child and additional complexity when adopting, and it’s clear this transition carries real weight.
I’ll never forget what one friend shared with me: “Having the baby went fine. It wasn’t until we were loading this new life into the car seat to drive home for the first time that it hit me – Yikes. This bundle of joy is my responsibility. I hope I don’t screw it up.”
In this role mom is the primary caregiver, an awesome responsibility that arrives without a handbook.
Then some experience motherhood with multiple children. I can’t count the number of times friends and family have said that once you’re outnumbered, life can feel overwhelming. This phase often demands shifts in household routines and childcare responsibilities just to keep everything moving. The role of example-setter, organizer, and chief cheerleader expands dramatically.
My mom (along with dad) took on many roles: personal driver and driving instructor, chef, housekeeper, tutor, lawn keeper and the like. Out of necessity, she became especially skilled at delegation, a survival skill that many moms master earlier than they might expect.
Then there are the teenage and early adult years. My husband’s mother raised three boys. When asked whether she missed having a daughter she replied “No, I’m good with three boys. I would never want to raise a mini-me.”
These years call for deep mentoring, steady coaching, and an ongoing practice of letting go particularly since brains don’t fully mature until the mid to late twenties, with recent research suggesting development may even extend into the thirties.
When my sibs and I left home for the last time, we carried with us a solid set of life skills: cooking, cleaning, laundry, landscaping, gardening, basic auto care, financial literacy, organization, communicating, adaptability, conflict resolution, and respect (essential skills in a household of ten).
That transition ushers in the empty nester phase for moms. While it can take time to adjust to a quieter household (and convert a bedroom into she-shed), it also offers a meaningful opportunity to rediscover interests, refresh passions, renew friendships, and explore what this next stage of life might hold.
So, as you celebrate or think fondly of your own mom this Mother’s Day, take a moment to recognize the other moms in your life as well as the transitions they may be navigating.
A Coaching Reflection: What Motherhood Teaches Us About Transition
Motherhood may be the most dynamic leadership journey there is. It demands continuous reinvention, adaptability without guarantees, and resilience built one season at a time.
Across every phase, a pattern emerges:
- Leading without a clear roadmap
- Making decisions with imperfect information
- Holding responsibility long before feeling “ready”
- Letting go, again and again
- Redefining identity again as circumstances change
These are not just parenting skills. They are life skills. Career skills. Leadership skills.
Questions to ponder this Mother’s Day:
- Which phase of motherhood, or support of others, am I currently navigating?
- What is this season asking of me now and how is that different from before?
- Where might I offer myself (or another mom) more compassion during change?
- Who around me may be quietly navigating a significant transition?
Mother’s Day isn’t just about celebration. It’s an opportunity to see the invisible transitions and acknowledge the strength it takes to walk through them.
Happy Mother’s Day to all you moms out there! (I love you, Mom!)
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